19,000 Years
🥯 This is Sunday December 8th, 2024 🥯
Three thousand years after the humans blew each other up with cheap nukes purchased on Temu, the creatures of Xanax came to the earth to look at the remnants embedded on USB keys strewn about the planet alongside light blue medical masks that people would wear for an entire season before changing.
On the keys, the only thing they were able to find was videos of humans having sex with each other and themselves.
They didn’t just find a few of these videos, they found that humans left behind 19,000 years of footage of nature.
No evidence of all the great discoveries in science and technology were left behind.
The stories of Mother Theresa, Martin Luther King Jr. and Jesus. The music of Bach, the paintings of the Dutch masters and the tearjerking films of Steven Spielberg were all forgotten.
Just random videos of Brazilian women pooping into Dixie® cups.
19,000 years of footage shot in this cheap, amateur style was all the humans could be represented by.
Dating Diaries
This week I had a phone call with a dentist in her early 30s. After telling me she is not political she kept rattling off all kinds of garbage to me. And then insisted again she’s not political.
I proceeded to tell her that I think she’s childish. I had no other word for how this discussion was going. The poor girl was mortified by this assessment.
She told me that I don’t know her history or what she’s been through and who am I to make that statement about her.
So I guess she had a good reason for running her mouth on random issues that don’t concern her day-to-day life and will continue to perpetuate misunderstanding amongst all people.
Cawfee Tawk
You’d be surprised: after being burned buying high-end coffee beans from a micro-farm in Guatemala that don’t brew well, sometimes the pre-ground grocery store brand that we typically scoff at is perfectly fine and tasty.
Just make sure to buy good filters. My parents left behind cheap ones before I moved in for dog sitting and the first line of action was to order these Japanese Haros which do not leave that acidic bleach taste behind.
Pourover coffee is the life!
——
Videos I made this week
Cabin fever while on Poodle Patrol
Watch Videos (18+ there is a lot of swearing in the football videos)
December Playlist
Here is my mood board for the month with two of my newest choons included.
Enjoy a bagel and watch men bash each other’s heads together with some 🏈rarrr!